One of the hardest lesson to learn in 2018 was the idea that “Action leads to Inspiration which leads to Motivation.” Finding motivation to do what ought to be done felt like a tug of war between my fears and desires. When you’re depressed, dealing with anxiety, or feeling overwhelmingly stressed, pushing yourself into action is another battle in itself. For me, springing into action starts after I muster up the strength to push myself out of bed and brush my teeth but not before ruminating over all the worst case scenarios of my entire life while beating myself up over not doing that thing I said I was going to do last week that’s now 3 weeks past due.
My cycle of getting things done centered around being emotionally inspired/grounded. The problem with this approach was my emotions were never consistent week to week, day to day, or even throughout the day. There would be long stretches of days where all I wanted to do was lay in bed and sulk over thoughts of not living the life I envisioned I would be. Operating under this model caused numerous setbacks and missed opportunities.
What I eventually started to comprehend was my best days were the days when I actively and consistently worked towards my goals one at a time. They were the moments where I planned my days accordingly, was self-aware, and was not overly critical of my accomplishment. I wanted to experience days like this more frequently and consistently. Whenever I felt myself getting triggered and the sea of negative thoughts started taking hold, I first had to recognize what was happening, take stock of how I felt and what caused this feeling then consciously remove myself from that situation. Little things that helped included getting out of bed, caring for myself in some way whether that was taking a shower or not wearing the same lounging around clothes for the 3rd consecutive day, cleaning my space, or getting out the house. Those easy acts of self-care would eventually lead me to look up information related to something I wanted to talk about on the blog or searching for inspiration for a new project.
Over time I started to grasp that the things I’ve been complaining about and mentally berating myself over required grappling with vulnerability and getting comfortable with the uncomfortable. It meant doing things that scare me and being okay with being a beginner. I began understanding that the underlining issues at hand were that I felt inadequate and avoiding those feeling by not acting only prolonged my distress.
This idea presented by Mark Manson has been the catalyst that’s pushed me to set my sights high this new year. As mentioned in last week’s post, this year I’m opening my online business and becoming a more dedicated and consistent blogger. For years I’ve dreamt about being a business owner and creating a website of some sort but my confidence and ability to believe in myself were not as strong as my desires. I struggled with comparisons, self-doubt, over-identifying my self-worth with my accomplishments and to be honest it is still a challenge. But what I’ve come to learn over time but most profoundly in 2018 is that laying idly by will not make any of these hardships any easier. It’s the reason why I’ve deemed 2019 as the year of passion projects aka Do Something Year.
I’ve talked extensively in the past about my desires to diversify the blog and branch out into other areas of interests outside of personal development. 2019 is the year I’m taking the plunge and doing just that. As the year progresses topics will include Art & DIY’s, Fashion and Beauty, Food, Simple/Sustainable Living and of course Wellness/Personal Development. I’ve been intimidated by other blogs that are very polished and well put together and never gave myself the room and permission to try, fail, and try again. I’ve grown tired of second-guessing myself so 2019 is the year for more action and less judgment, more mistakes and less complaining, more fun and less doubt.
Life is challenging and it’s delusional to think that one can get through it unscathed. Take notice of how self-protection might be hindering you from going after what you want. If you find yourself feeling unfulfilled in your daily life, ask yourself, “How do I want to spend my days?” Figure out those simple pleasures that keep you satisfied and fulfilled. Then ask yourself, “Am I actively doing these things?” If the answer is no, figure out what might be holding you back, then start injecting some of those things back into your daily life. Instead of complaining, redirect that energy and simply Do Something, ANYTHING! The sooner you act the better you’ll feel over time. Staying stuck in fear, doubt, or frustration is not the solution.